Title: Boogie

Author: Brionhet

E-mail: bri@brionhet.com

Date: August 20, 2001

Categories and Rating: Humor.  Slightly PG.  Het, sort of.  Almost.  Sam and Teal'c.  Nearly.  

Status: Complete

Archive: Yes to list archives.  Anyone else interested please ask.

Spoilers:  None

Season/Story Info:  Independent story. Some time in fifth season.

Disclaimers:Stargate SG-1 and its characters are properties of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions and Gekko Productions.  Much to my sorrow, I think that precludes me claiming either the archaeologist or the colonel. Original characters, situations and story are the property of the author and are not to be appropriated without the permission of  the author.  This story is intended for entertainment purposes only; no money will be made with it.  Trust me.  No money.

Summary: Sam experiences an epiphany.

Warnings:  Slight flavor of het.  But none, really.

Notes:  Thanks to Jmas and Brenda for giving it a little look so I'd be brave enough to post :^) 

Boogie notes—complete lyrics

Superman Sex Life Boogie

~ Tom Smith

Well I’m a small town boy with a heart of gold,

Not to mention heat vision and breath that’s cold.

I got super strength; I’m immune to pain,

But I’m weak in the knees around Lois Lane.

She’s got a sexy walk and the bluest eyes;

Her clothes are all painted onto her thighs.

She’s got great taste, so I just don’t see

Why she’s in love with my costume and not with me.

I can change the course of rivers, bend steel in my bare hands.

But none of that hockey macho stuff makes me feel any more like a man.

I’m faster than a speeding bullet; I’m tougher than a moving train,

But why leap a tall building in a single bound, when I’d rather jump Lois Lane?

Now I’m a nice easy goin’ kinda guy;

I got mild manners and my wit is dry.

But it doesn’t ever seem to matter what I say,

‘Cause Lois never gives me the time of day.

But when I fly the city in my blue and red,

She’d risk the whole world just to get me to bed.

But that’s not the way I want to let her get my bod;

That’s not making love, it’s seducing God!

I’ve told her a thousand times we can never have normal sex…

If I lose control we can get David Kronenberg to do the special effects.

I’m faster than a speeding bullet; I’m tougher than a moving train,

But why leap a tall building in a single bound, when I’d rather jump Lois Lane?

Well, I’m sick of all the supervillains poking fun

Just because I’m still a virgin at age thirty-one.

I don’t like the names that I’m being called;

I couldn’t care if Lex Luthor’s always been more bald.

I’d love to let Lois know the way I feel,

To let her know the man underneath the steel.

But she doesn’t want to have a thing to do with me

Unless I’m out bashing baddies in my BVDs…

I’ve had it with the hero biz; frustration has got me down…

Why should I bother with saving the city when I’d rather be painting the town.

I’m faster than a speeding bullet; I’m tougher than a moving train,

But I’d throw it all away in a minute if I could just once get the jump on Lane…