Title:
The Profoundest Fact
Date: December 24, 2001
Author: JayEm
Email: Jay_Em5@yahoo.com
Status: Complete
Rating: PG13
Category: pre-slash, angst, hc
Pairing: J/D
Spoilers: Rite of Passage <small one>
Summary: Solitude is the profoundest fact of the human condition. Man is the
only being who knows he is alone." -Octavio Paz, The Labyrinth of
Solitude, 1950
Disclaimer:
The characters mentioned in this story are the property of Showtime and Gekko Film Corp. The Stargate, SG-I, the Goa'uld and all other
characters who have appeared in the series STARGATE SG-1 together with the
names, titles and backstory are the sole copyright property of MGM-UA
Worldwide Television, Gekko Film Corp, Glassner/Wright Double Secret
Productions and Stargate SG-I Prod. Ltd. Partnership. This fanfic is not
intended as an infringement upon those rights and solely meant for
entertainment. All other characters, the story idea and the story itself are
the sole property of the author.
Notes:
Thanks to CarolS for the image that sparked the story, and no, Carol, nothing
is ever as simple as it begins with me, hon<g>. Belated birthday to Phee
and Bri. ‘Tis the season for schmoop…
By JayEm
It had all started simply enough, chasing up a mountainside in search of the perfect Christmas tree for Cassandra. Janet’s daughter and the team’s adopted niece was growing up way too fast and after the bad time she’d been through with the retro-virus they were all a bit more sensitive to the fragility of life this season. So they’d piled into Jack’s truck and headed for the mountains, sure that no generic, tree-lot specimen could ever be good enough. Jack had split off with Daniel, while Carter and Teal’c had taken a second trail around the crest of the mountain. It had been a good day, joking and goofing off with an abandon they were never able to achieve off-world due to the necessity of always being on guard.
Jack had found himself sighing at the pleasure of it all. Daniel’s company outside work was always a thing to be encouraged and treasured. The younger man had a way of focusing his entire attention on Jack that was both comfortable and flattering. And more and more the comfort had become a necessity to Jack in ways he’d been trying very hard to ignore.
Daniel had been sharing a story about Egypt, a Christmas spent on an oasis and a decorated piece of scrub that had meant just as much to him as any towering spruce. It had been a good moment, a special memory and an open insight into Daniel that was rarely given.
Things had been going so well - until they actually found the tree Jack deemed perfect. A quick call on the portable radios Carter had brought along had them heading back to their position so he and Daniel had decided to go ahead and cut the tree while they were waiting. Who could have guessed the ground under the tree was unstable, would give way when Daniel climbed to the upper side of the tree, bringing the tree down on him and jamming his leg into a hole none of their simple tools had been able to extract it from. The wonderful day had gone sour in the space of a moment.
Now it was getting dark, and Carter and Teal’c had gone back to the truck to get tools and call for help on the cell phone Jack hadn’t thought they’d need to bring along. He’d scrounged enough brush to start a fire and thrown his jacket over Daniel to help ward off the deepening chill. They’d gotten the tree off him, that had been something, but Daniel’s leg disappeared underground from upper-calf down. Pulling on it hadn’t worked - and hard as he tried Daniel couldn’t stifle the yelps of pain every time they tried.
Jack worried about what his foot or leg might have gone into under the dirt and stones. Looking at the worn chukka on Daniel’s free leg, Jack knew the thin soles of the boots wouldn’t provide much protection against any sort of sticks or sharp object that might have lain beneath him when his own weight and that of the tree had wedged him into the hole.
Daniel was pale and beginning to shiver in the cooling air, and all Jack could think was that he might be bleeding to death and they had no way to know. Jack moved behind Daniel, laying a hand on his shoulder.
“You okay?”
Daniel snorted a little, nodding his head as he hugged Jack’s leather coat closer around him. “Dumb question, Jack…”
Jack grinned a little; he’d known it when he’d asked. A shudder from Daniel notched his worry up another level. Stooping down behind Daniel, he rubbed the other man’s shoulders briskly to help warm him. Daniel jumped a little, then settled with a nod. After long minutes, Daniel was still shivering and hunching deeper into the coat, his face paler than ever.
Shock. Damn. He was losing blood after all.
Jack scooted down, gingerly placing his legs around Daniel and scooting forward to bring him up against Daniel’s back. He pulled the younger man to him and drew the coat closer, rubbing at Daniel’s arms to warm him. Little by little Daniel leaned back, relaxing slowly as the warmth and support eased the tension in his body.
His skin was so cold…
“Jack?”
“Um…?”
“Nuts to think after all we’ve been through I’d …”
Jack tightened his hold on Daniel, shaking him once roughly. “No. No, Daniel, I don’t think so at all….Not going to happen…” It couldn’t happen.
The thought of losing Daniel like this - in such a stupid, senseless way was completely unthinkable. Jack had just barely come to grips with the fact of Daniel’s importance in his life; he couldn’t lose that now - he wouldn’t. He didn’t want to be alone anymore and without Daniel he always would be….
Jack stiffened at the realization he’d just come to. So simple, really. He loved Daniel. Loved him with the heart deep, soul shattering kind of love it would kill him to lose - the kind that would never find its place again without Daniel. Jack had been lucky to feel that kind of love twice in his life, he knew a third time for him would be a miracle he wouldn’t have the strength to wait for. The only problem was….
Daniel was lying limp in Jack’s arms, not exactly asleep but letting his guard down in a way he had only ever done with Jack. And Jack knew all too well such displays of trust were the exception not the rule of Daniel’s life so it never failed to touch him when such moments as this proved it. Tenderly, Jack reached up a hand to rub at Daniel’s shoulder, gently rocking them both in an instinctive rhythm meant to soothe, meant to express the things Jack didn’t have the words for.
“Jack?”
“Hmm?”
Jack could feel Daniel swallowing, could see his mouth open and close in that way he had of trying out his words before actually saying them.
“Could you…could you hold on a little tighter?”
The words both thrilled and scared Jack. He wanted to hold Daniel, would hold him forever if allowed, but for Daniel to ask…
Daniel never asked.
Jack tightened both arms around Daniel, worry tightening his heart every bit as much and closing his throat around the protest that fought to erupt.
“It hurts, Jack…” Daniel’s voice was a bare whisper, a reluctant admission of how bad things really were.
Jack nodded, holding on tighter. “I know…Carter and Teal’c’ll be back soon and we’ll get you the hell out here. Fraiser will patch you up and we’ll get off work ‘til the new year…Just you and me, whatever you want to do. Sound good?”
Daniel nodded briefly, cold hands coming up to hold onto Jack’s. “Good. Like spending time with you…”
Jack smiled despite the seriousness of the situation. “You do?”
A nod tickled Jack’s cheek. “Better than anything…always have…”
“Really?” The knowledge was a revelation Jack hadn’t expected, and it warmed him down to his toes.
Daniel nodded again, his words slurring a little. “Best. No one like you, Jack…never will be for me…”
Jack rubbed a hand down Daniel’s cheek, not caring what it seemed like. “Me, too, Daniel. Me, too.”
A puff of air against his hand told Jack that Daniel was smiling. “Can I tell you I love you, Jack? Just in case…You can forget it tomorrow if…”
Anger and pleasure warred against one another in Jack’s heart. Anger that Daniel might be giving up, pleasure at the words he offered, anger that Daniel didn’t seem to know…
Shifting around so he could look Daniel in the eye, Jack shook his head. “No, Daniel. I won’t forget. I’ll never forget.” Daniel looked away, eyes bright with the pain of misunderstanding. Jack gently grasped Daniel’s chin and drew him back to look into his eyes again. “I’ll never forget it because I’ve wanted to hear it for a long, long time…”
Daniel’s head cocked over with a question look Jack found hopelessly endearing, a smile slowly twitching at the corners of his mouth. “You have?”
Jack nodded, using the hand on Daniel’s chin to draw the other man close. “Seems like forever…” He bent to kiss Daniel delicately on the lips.
The lips under his smiled wider under the kiss. “Yeah…”
Another brush of skin, more forceful this time and a promise of heat and passion they both knew lay under their separate surfaces. Jack pulled away as Carter’s voice carried up to him from the tree line where she and Teal’c were just emerging, flashlights cutting the gathering dusk. With a last loving smile at Daniel he pulled back, more than ready to free his future from this pain so they could move on to more pleasurable things.
Christmas once again held the promise he’d known so long ago - a promise of peace, love and contentment in the arms of someone who would share his world for as long as life would allow and beyond.
And they’d never be alone.
Never again.
*fin*